Another term has passed, and I finally get to sit down and catch my breath from all the chaos happening around me. A few days sitting inside the eye of the storm, a moment to prepare for whatever lies ahead.

I have to admit if there was one thing this term has done to me - it has had me humbled. 

Humbled, knowing how inadequate I am as a leader.

Humbled, knowing that I had to plead with a professor just to pass a subject.

Humbled, knowing how much I don't have control of my life.

Humbled, knowing how much I don't know about life in general. 

And Humbled, knowing that despite all these frailties and flaws this term has exposed to me, there were always people who would try to pick me up and dust me off.

    Whether it was a word of encouragement, a tap on the back, a hug, a pinch, a harsh reprimand, scolding, criticizing. I'm greatful for it. I never really thought I deserve any of the help I've gotten now. And I feel I owe it to the world not to give up. Try not shy away from responsibility anymore, and for once try to take charge.

    As someone told me "You're already 20. It'd be forgivable if you wer 16 or 17. But your 20! If your still scared, stop it! Your too old to be scared"

I apologize for being so weak. I'll do my best to make up for it.

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I've been talking with a friend recently, and it seems that I've missed an opportunity for something special.

I dunno. I guess you never really see things for what they really are when it's right in front of you, and then when its gone, you start to realize how significant those things are, and all you can do is sit back and blame yourself for not giving it as much importance as it should.

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Ah, fuck it! That's enough emo shit for one night.